Grey: The New Red

In a not-so-disguised attempt to get a comment on my blog published in The Guardian, I'm going to start randomly commenting on current affairs.
So here's your high-brow section boys and girls....

Leave. Them. Alone. The Forestry Commission has been given the job of killing grey squirrels because of the threat they are to the native red squirrel. Is it just me or is everything a "threat: to be controlled and contained" these days. Squirrels? Really? Anyway, I protest. For a number of reasons....
1) I like grey squirrels. They're tough and fearless little buggers, they like to eat (anthing and everything- I'm with you guys), and they have a totally comedy appearance (like a miniature kangeroo with a feather-duster up its butt).
2) Let's straighten something out. These are not ruthless killers. They are not turning up at red squirrels' warrens with AK47s, assuming their identities and burying them under their patios. This isn't even a tale of cross-cultural West-Side-Story style gang rivalry. The poor little greys are just inadvertantly carrying a virus which has no effect on them but kills a red within 2 weeks. They're SICK little fluffy animals... and probably quite paranoid ones now that they've seen friend-after-fluffly-red-friend kick the bucket soon after their meeting...
3) I hate all this "they're not really British" business. If the first greys arrived in the 1870s, then we must be on at least the 30th generation of them by now. Are they still squeaking in American accents? Do they salute the star spangled banner every morning before nut collection? Would we like them to attend citizenship class?
And let me get this straight. They sail across the Atlantic during the mid-19th Century and upon arriving in a new world proceed to disrupt the native way of life with their different approach to the land and bring a pox that kills much of the indigenous population. Any of this sounding strangely familiar?